Updated: Sep 14, 2020
When I left my career to pursue my dreams, I had one person who believed in me. ONE! (my Mom) My own family and spouse at that time openly doubted me. I quickly learned that in life, (even with support) there’s going to be one person cheering you on the loudest and working the hardest to create the life you want to design and that’s you! From that moment on, I had to become my own biggest fan, let go of wanting or needing validation from others, and be confident of the person I was - I had to become unstoppable.
Confidence is believing in yourself, feeling comfortable in your own skin and knowing your worth (which is really high, btw!) The truth is, YOU have to be your own biggest fan. Believing in yourself is your secret sauce - in everything you do. From relationships to your career to pursuing your goals and dreams, YOU are the difference maker! The power from within is what is going to keep you pushing and give you the determination to show up as your best self every single day and never settle for less.
How do you feel when you put on a new outfit for the first time? When you just get your hair done or when you have a fresh spray tan?? You feel like a million bucks! I want you to have that same confidence daily, in all things you do. I didn’t say every day will be butterflies and rainbows but when you are confident and believe in yourself in all aspects of your life, how you show up is going to look and feel different and that is when you’re truly tapping into your power.
So how do you become that confident rockstar of a woman that you know you are?! Here are some keys steps you can take:
Visualize your absolute best self. I want you to visualize yourself as the person you want to be - (the absolute best version of yourself.) What does the highest version of yourself look and feel like? Truly visualize this, write it down, close your eyes so you can see and feel yourself living out what you wrote down. What would your career look like? Your family life? How would you look? How would you dress? What kind of car would you drive? Where would you live? What goals would you be pursuing?
TIP: Vision/Picture boards are a great tool to use to keep you on track. Think about the words you wrote down and the visions you had when you closed your eyes, find pictures of those visions, and post them in a place where you can see them daily to remind you and keep you motivated.
Be your own biggest fan. This requires that you believe in yourself deep into your core! Have faith in your own abilities. Stop doubting yourself, you got this! Time after time you have proved yourself wrong. Think of all the things that you once thought you couldn’t do or overcome, I bet you did, didn't do you?! Use your own track record as a constant reminder of all you're capable of when fear and doubt start to creep in. You made it through or accomplished major stuff in the past so why start doubting yourself now? These past times will remind you of the true strength you have and reinforce your power to be unstoppable.
Know your Worth. What do you believe you deserve? Think back to step 1 when you envisioned your highest self and all she deserves, YOU DESERVE ALL THAT AND MORE! So don’t discount or accept any less. Think about 3 or more of your greatest qualities whether they relate to your career, your relationships, your family or create three for each. These qualities are what make you, you and what make you so darn special! When you know what sets you apart and makes you great you’re going to believe in yourself, know what you're capable of and have true confidence in who you are and will never settle for less regardless if others see your worth or not.
Challenge yourself and push yourself to grow. Don’t let the comfort of what you’re used to keep you in the same spot. Go after what you want. It may be scary or feel uncomfortable, what new things aren’t? In order to be our best self, it is going to require that we are dedicated to becoming our best. What does that mean? In school or when you’re trying to achieve something, what do you do? You put in work. You don’t do the same things over and over again and hope for a new result. Becoming our best self requires dedication to ourselves to constantly do work within. The best part is the work we do within benefits us in every aspect of our life, how rewarding is that?!
TIP: My favs - podcasts daily, (click here to read my article on Why Podcasts are the Easiest way to add to your Growth TODAY) read books (if you’re not a reader, even more reasons for podcasts), I like to attend at least one personal development seminars yearly.
Don’t be your own worst enemy. We are our harshest critics. Give yourself credit for everything you are. I could pick myself apart over and over again if I really wanted, but why?! Instead, build yourself up. Think of all the great things about yourself! When a negative thought or doubt creeps it, hack it right out of your mind. We have a choice to give in to those thoughts or we can spit them out like a sunflower seed and turn it around to a positive one instead. In step 3 we wrote down some of our greatest qualities, post them on your mirror, read them daily, don’t ever let yourself be the one in your own way.
Don’t compare yourself to others. Stop looking around at others and work on being in love with the person in the mirror. It doesn’t matter what stage of life or time table you’re on versus those around you, life unfolds for everyone in different ways at different times. You don’t truly know what it’s like to be in someone else’s shoes, don’t waste your time comparing or wishing for something, instead use that time to invest in yourself and your goals to get you where you want to be. The fact of the matter is, you are special, you are one of a kind - no one is you and that is your power.
Learn from your mistakes. Sometimes we let our past mistakes eat away at us rather than teach the lessons they were meant to serve. We’re all imperfect and we all make mistakes, all of our mistakes contain valuable lessons that we can reflect on to help us grow into becoming our best self. One of the important things we can do is use our experiences to remind us of everything we have overcome and made it through. Use that as your power to give you confidence knowing that you can always pick yourself back up, just as you always have before.
Think about the best outcome. We can overwhelm ourselves if we think about everything that could go wrong, even when we can’t control the situation around us, we can always choose where we’re directing our attention. When you’re your own biggest fan you know that despite it all you will make the best of it and even in the hardest of times, it’s all temporary and you will come out on top.
Celebrate your own success. Reflect to remind yourself of all you’ve done, everything you’ve been through, and take an inventory of what you’re living out that you once wished for. Oftentimes the littlest things have some of the biggest impacts but are easily overlooked. Celebrate yourself and your victories, then get focused, go after it, and get ready to celebrate again.
Get your sweat on. I don’t care how you do it, just do it. (this isn’t sponsored by Nike, haha!) I promise you this is a game-changer. If this isn’t your thing, start with daily walks in your neighborhood. Get your body moving at least a few times a week and you will start to feel an immediate difference!! Your mind will feel more clear, your body loves to move and this is going to translate into you feeling your best all around. (click here for my Must Have Workout Apps)
TIP: On your hardest days, MOVE YOUR BODY, go for a walk, go for a run, I promise you will feel uplifted after and won’t regret the time you took to shake your bad day off.
Give compliments. When you are so in love with yourself you will find that you will notice great things about others more often. Don’t hold back, you see someone with a top you like, let them know. You have a friend that’s killing it at work, give her praise. You want to learn a skill someone else has that you don’t, ask. Giving others compliments and praise, regardless of where you’re at in life will not only make their day but help you shine even brighter. Don’t hold back, spread your love, and spread your light.
OWN IT. You are unstoppable. Don’t let the fear of what others think cloud your thinking or stop you from being the amazing woman you are. Confidence means owning all that you are, don’t sink down when you’re unsure, rise up, and own every aspect of who you are and the road it took to become that woman. Love yourself, all of yourself. You are the CEO of your life (click to read You Are The CEO of our Life), you get to pick and choose what that looks like regardless of what anyone says or thinks. Step into who you really are, be proud, rise up, and always stand up tall and own the great woman you truly are!
“I learned a long time ago the wisest thing I can do is be on my own side.” -Maya Angelou
You are amazing, you are unstoppable, you deserve the best. Be your own biggest fan, cheer for yourself, and let others cheer for you too. - You’ve Got the Power!